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(C93) [Pirokobo (Piro)] Toaru Doyou no Hi (Isekai Shokudou) [English] [DKAMD]

(C93) [ピロコボ (Piro)] とあるドヨウの日 (異世界食堂) [英訳]

Free Hentai Doujinshi Gallery: (C93) [Pirokobo (Piro)] Toaru Doyou no Hi (Isekai Shokudou) [English] [DKAMD]
Posted:2018-04-21 02:50
Parent:1213389
Visible:Yes
Language:English  TR
File Size:116.7 MB
Length:26 pages
Favorited:471 times
Rating:
130
Average: 4.58

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Posted on 21 April 2018, 02:50 UTC by:   kokokbeluk     PM
Uploader Comment
Translator: PeanuTs
Editor: kokokbeluk
QC: Reigo Vassal (LA Lord)
Helper: Hana
Raw: http://gzou.erokuni.xyz/?g-hentai/g/1172626/49699966bb/

We are the admin from Facebook Page "Di Kala Anda Membaca Doujin" (FP that share manga/doujinshi randomly with sauce).
And this is the first time we do stuff like this.
And keep in mind that English is not our native language.
Any suggestion of modification are welcome.

Our Facebook Page: https://ouo.io/Mp4YkS (Indonesian only)

Edited: Already fixed on page 2, 3, 8, 10, 11, 14, 15, 16, 17, 22, 23.
Thanks to @SpaceCamel for the sugestion.
Posted on 20 April 2018, 11:08 UTC by:   kanoon48     PM
Score +49
Pg.13
SMILE TO PROTECT
Posted on 20 April 2018, 11:32 UTC by:   MonMon19     PM
Score +28
Reads a bit off... Might want to recruit some proofreader/QC, otherwise good editing for your first try.
Posted on 20 April 2018, 11:34 UTC by:   SpaceCamel     PM
Score +83
Thanks for the translation! English isn't my native language too, but I'll be happy to help and try to find all the typos I can ;)

p2: "something happen" => "something happened" ; "feel asleep" => "fell asleep"
p3: "I'm already get used" => "I'm already getting used"
p8: "This is also fault" => "This is also your fault"
p10: "But I just finishes working" => "But I just finished working" ; "It's okay if it feels hurt..." => "What if it hurts..." (makes more sense with the next bubble IMO, but could be far from the original so not sure)
p11: "You already wet" => "You're already wet"
p14: "Tell me if it start feel hurts" => "Tell me if it starts to hurt" ; "It's hurts, right?" => "It hurts, right?"
p15: "Does all demon feel this good?" => "Do all demons feel this good?" ; "I took off your uniform" => "I'm taking off your uniform" (current action)
p16: "Sorry if I looks weird..." => "Sorry if it looks weird..." / "Sorry if I look weird" (Again, not sure of the original meaning if she's talking about her chest or herself) ; "Does it feels better?" => "Does it feel better?"
p17: "Looks like you've get used to it" => "Looks like you've got used to it"
p22: "Does it... still feels weird" => "Does it... still feel weird?"
p23: "...make me keep moving forward" => "...makes me keep moving forward"

And I guess that's all I found
Don't hesitate to rectify what you want if you don't agree with one of those above

Thanks again for the translation, and a good day to you!
Last edited on 20 April 2018, 12:55 UTC.
Posted on 20 April 2018, 13:57 UTC by:   kokokbeluk     PM
Score +18
@SpaceCamel. Woah, so much to be fixed. Thanks for your sugestion. We will improve the translation quality in the future. ^▼^
Posted on 20 April 2018, 20:21 UTC by:   Lurker31     PM
Score +10
Fun fact: Aletta is actually 50 years old.
Posted on 21 April 2018, 04:15 UTC by:   FruitTart     PM
Score +29
I'm not super fluent in Japanese, but I think I can understand the raw for the most part. Comparing it (I may be a bit overly critical for a first time thing),

p2
- "One day..." -> "On a certain Day of Satur".
- "...Something happened to me" -> "I really messed up." or something along those lines. Your bottom of p3 "I really did it" has the right idea since the line is really similar.
- "...I feel so tired" -> "I was exhausted". It's past tense. "I felt so tired." is fine too though. I just prefer it the other way.

p3
- "... I get a bit slower." -> "I think I've become a bit (too) careless". Combining with the previous line I would put "I've gotten so used to the work here" + "I think I've become a bit (too) careless.". Not sure if careless is the best word here, but the meaning isn't speed. It's more like she's too relaxed and not on guard (which is why she fell asleep).
- "I don't remember anything after I do the cleaning." -> Might just be a grammar issue, but this translation would mean this is an ongoing type of thing (she always forgets everything after she cleans), which shouldn't be the case. A simple fix is to change "do" to "did".
- Bottom right panel: You cleaned out the line "Then... the place back there was master's bedroom?" from the raw and didn't put it in.

p4
- Top left panel: You took out the "..." from the top right of Aletta. Not sure if this was intentional but yeah.
- "Master... I think he's exhaused" -> Typo (exhausted), but a rough translation of this line should be something like "Did he give up his bedroom for me?".
- Middle right panel, left of the guy's face: Aletta said "Master..." but you didn't write it back in.
- "...Why he can be so kind to me?" -> "Why is he so kind to me?" Or, "How can he be so kind to me?"

I skipped p5-22.

p23
- "On another world." -> "In this world."
- "Another job interview." -> "On the interview day for another job." Might be a little long, but it's supposed to be another job, not another interview. Hopefully that makes sense.
- "Yosh!" -> "All right!" Or I guess you could keep it like that if you really wanted... But the point is she's pumped/ready.
- "The confidence I got from master that day..." -> "The small boost of confidence (which) I got from master that day..." I'd add the "The small boost" since the raw has it and still sounds fine.
- "Excuse me..." -> "Excuse me!" She's too quiet if you use "..." and she's supposed to be loud here. I think you're using it to connect to the next sentence which imo really isn't necessary.
- "... I want to apply for a job here." -> "I've been referred here by my employment agency!" Not sure on this, but employment agency is missing from the line for sure.
- "...makes me keep moving forward." -> "...has allowed me to move on from my hat." You can put something like "...has allowed me to keep moving forward without my hat" instead if you want since the meaning would be about the same.

I think this makes a lot more sense with these changes (and hopefully they're correct). Anyways, best of luck on your future translations.
Last edited on 21 April 2018, 10:50 UTC.

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